ode to the old ladies who tell me how to live

I had the opportunity to chat with a "delightful" old lady not too long ago and she informed me that we must have someone to shovel our driveway (mind you its gravel and not too easy to shovel), My decorations above my kitchen cabinets will kill me in an earthquake, my daughter is tired and needs a nap and the salon is too cold and it will be the death of her if she has wet hair in it. She is one of Melissas clients that is right now getting a perm. The heater was turned on the minute I walked in the salon so it would warm up, I know it takes a little time but she surely wouldn't die. So I invited her in my home while we waited for Melissa to get here and while inside she let me know what a hazard my glass objects above my cabinets are if an earthquake hits Ogden. My thoughts are if there is an earthquake close by my home it will brake the Pineview dam and my house will no longer be on its foundation; as for the glass things it would probably be better for me to die by getting hit by them than killed by drowning in the icy cold, debris filled water from Pineview. Yes my daughter is tired, she has a hard time sleeping, she cried in her crib for an hour and I got her out and decided to put her down later, no a dolly or stuffed animal will not get her to sleep. As for the driveway, two days in a row I was able to shovel half of it, yes your car will get out of the driveway it isn't parked in a snowdrift just in tire tracks from our car that easily got out of the same place yesterday. When I get old I just don't plan on being so breakable. I know I should care more, but when it comes to buying some bags of rock salt or bare necessity foods I'm gonna go with food that's just been our situation lately. Although tonight i probably will go pick up a bag and salt down some of the slick parts even though it will snow tomorrow. Man I feel better!